Frequently Asked Questions

Project Mistletoe is a location-based dating service that helps you meet people who are nearby right now. Unlike traditional dating apps where you swipe and message for weeks, we connect you with compatible matches when you're in the same vicinity.

Here's the simple process:

• Sign up: Create your profile by answering questions about yourself and what you're looking for.
• Check in: When you're out at a public place, use your personal check-in link to let us know you're open to meeting someone.
• Get matched: We'll text you if someone compatible is nearby (approximately 100 meters).
• Decide quickly: Say YES or NO to connecting with them.
• Meet in person: If you both say YES, you get 30 minutes to text anonymously and arrange to meet face-to-face.

We are currently building our user base in our own community, which is Boulder County, Colorado. Once we've proven it successful there, we will expand to other communities. This means that if you're outside Boulder County, it's very unlikely that there would many Project Mistletoe users in your vicinity.

Information about paid options is available on our website. We also offer a free plan that includes 2 matches per month. For the rest of 2025, we're offering unlimited matches within Boulder County, Colorado.

Other users never see your profile details directly. When you match with someone, they only see your age, gender, education level, and a brief AI-generated description of why you may be compatible—no names, photos, or other identifying information until you choose to share it in person. Also, we never sell your data, and we only use it for the purposes listed on our Privacy Policy page, such as safety, product improvement, payment processing, and developing new features.

Safety is our top priority, and while there's always some risk when you're meeting people you don't know, Project Mistletoe offers the following safety features:

• Anonymous matching and communication: Other users will never see information that could help them find you through other websites and information sources. Once matched, you text through our relay system without revealing your phone number.
• Public meetings only: We remind you to meet in public places. Always meet people for the first time in public, with plenty of other people around. If a match suggests that you meet somewhere secluded, please submit a report of this behavior.
• Optional "Always Notify Me First" feature: You can choose to always be notified first, so if you decline, the other person never knows the match took place. This prevents you from having to sit in a cafe near someone who knows you've decided not to meet them.
• Reporting system: Our Reports & Safety page offers an easy way to report inappropriate behavior. Once you verify your phone number by SMS, your recent matches will appear, and you can choose which one you're reporting. They you can fill out a form to categorize the behaviora and add a description of what happened. We will investigate, and offending users will have their accounts restricted or terminated.
• Time-limited relay: Anonymous texting expires after 30 minutes, encouraging quick in-person meetings.

We collect only what's necessary to make good matches:

• Phone number (for SMS notifications)
• Basic demographics (age, gender, education)
• Your self-description (personality, values, hobbies, physical appearance) and what you're looking for in a partner
• Your location only when you actively check in (we don't track you continuously or longitudinally)

We never sell your data. See our Privacy Policy for full details.

Yes. If someone behaves inappropriately, you can report them at any time by visiting projectmistletoe.com/report.html or replying REPORT to any match notification. We take all reports seriously and will investigate.

Location sharing works differently on iPhone and Android devices. Here's how to enable it:

Important: We only access your location when you actively click your check-in link. We do not track your location continuously or in the background.

Your check-in link is a unique URL sent to you via SMS after you complete or update your profile. When you're out at a cafe, bar, or restaurant and open to meeting someone, simply click the link. This tells our system you're available for matches. Save the link to your phone's home screen for easy access!

Check-ins last for 3 hours, unless you end it manually. You can check in again anytime during those 3 hours to extend it (or if you've moved to a different location), or you can just let it expire.

It depends whether either of you selected the "Always Notify Me First" option:

• If you're notified first and say YES, then we will notify the other person. If they say NO, then the match will expire on its own.
• If they're notified first and say NO, then we will never notify you of the match.
• If you're both notified simultaneously (neither of you selected "Always Notify Me First"), then if you say YES and they say NO, the match will expire on its own.
• If you BOTH selected "Always Notify Me First," then you will never be matched, since there's no way to notify you both first.

Once both people say YES, you can text each other anonymously through our relay system for 30 minutes. Your phone numbers stay private. Use this time to decide where to meet face-to-face. You can send up to 2 photos each to help identify each other. After 30 minutes, the relay closes automatically. If you have not exchanged your actual contact information by then, you will no longer be able to contact one another.

Our current policy is not to rematch pairs of users if it does not work out the first time. We may revisit this policy based on actual usage of the service.

If you are in the same location as two or more people who may be compatible, we match you with the one we believe to be the most compatible. You are not matched with any other users until that match has expired.

Yes, by following the same sign-up process you used the first time. The sign-up form will be pre-filled with your previous answers so that you can edit them.

We use a multi-layered matching system:

• Hard filters: Gender, the gender you're seeking, age, education, and "must-haves" like non-smoker, sober, 420-friendly, liberal, conservative, wants to start a family, etc.
• AI compatibility: We analyze your personality, values, hobbies, lifestyle, and what you're looking for to find truly compatible matches.
• Location: You must both be nearby (within approximately 100 meters) and checked in at the same time.

Every match you receive has already passed all your filters and met our threshold for compatibility.

We use these attributes as dealbreakers. If you mark something as a must-have (like "non-smoker"), you will never be matched with someone who did not choose "non-smoker" as one of their attributes. That means that you should choose as FEW "must-haves" as possible and as MANY "attributes" as possible in order to maximize matches. But be honest. Don't claim an attribute that you don't really have. That just wastes everyone's time.

When you get a match notification, we tell you why! Standard and Plus plan members receive an AI-generated compatibility description explaining what you have in common. Free plan members get a generic message but still know the match meets all their requirements for gender, age, education, and must-haves.

Matches depend on three things being true simultaneously: compatible profiles, both people checked in, and both people nearby. (As we build our user base, matches will become more common because there will be more people using Project Mistletoe at any given time.) If you're not getting matches, try:

• Checking in during busier times (evenings and weekends)
• Checking in at popular spots where more people congregate
• Loosening your must-haves to widen your pool
• Telling your friends about Project Mistletoe so they sign up too! More users means better matches for everyone!

Check these common issues:

• Make sure you haven't blocked our number.
• Check if you accidentally replied STOP (reply START to re-enable).
• Verify your phone number is correct in your profile.
• Check your phone's spam/blocked messages folder.
• Some carriers filter automated messages—contact your carrier if needed.

You can cancel anytime through your PayPal account. Log into PayPal, go to Settings → Payments → Manage automatic payments, find Project Mistletoe, and cancel. Your service continues until the end of your current billing period. You can also do this through the "Manage Subscription" button on the Project Mistletoe website.

Visit the Delete Account page and follow the instructions. Please note there's a 90-day cooldown before you can create a new account with the same phone number. Also, we will retain some information from your account for the purposes of safety.

We'd love to hear from you! We're a small team working hard to improve the service. Please contact us at support@projectmistletoe.com with any issues or feedback.

Traditional dating apps have created endless swiping, ghosting, and pen pals who never meet. They've also undermined local connections because there's always someone better coming along-even if they live 100 miles away. Project Mistletoe is designed to get you off your phone and into real conversations in the community and places where you already spend your time:

• No profiles to browse: You can't swipe through potential matches—we only notify you when someone compatible is actually nearby.
• No endless messaging: You get 30 minutes to text, then the relay closes, encouraging you to meet face-to-face.
• Real people, real time: Every match is someone who's available right now, not someone you'll message for weeks.
• Serendipity meets science: We combine the magic of unexpected encounters with smart AI-powered compatibility.

We believe the best connections happen face-to-face. When you're both already out at a cafe or bar, there's no excuse not to meet. You can see each other's body language, hear their laugh, and feel that chemistry—or not—within minutes. No catfishing, no deceptive photos, no ghosting after weeks of texting. Just real people making real connections.